I will occasionally be posting about discipline strategies I use. Please keep in mind that I consider discipline as another word for teaching. In other words, an opportunity to discipline is an opportunity to teach correct behavior.
Here's an idea to try: For several weeks now I have been working with Bear to eliminate an undesirable action. Here's the history: for some reason, he seems to be scared to have a bowel movement (BM). I'm not sure exactly what triggered that, but we've been dealing with the consequences--withholding for several days and then screaming for Mama!!! when he finally goes.
First I tried a positive award system--he gets a treat every time he has a BM. This was effective at getting him to go a little more frequently, but he still would scream.
So, I tried increasing the reward--two treats if you don't scream. This was not really effective because he could handle getting only one treat. That was when my suspicions proved correct that most of the screaming was for attention and not out of true pain. (we'll discuss discipline and attention in another post).
So, I used his little sister as an example. "See what Bee says when she is on the potty? Can you say what she says?"
It was not until I showed him a positive replacement behavior that the negative behavior ceased. In showing a replacement behavior, you need to be careful that you are not "comparing" in a negative way as in, "your little sister doesn't scream, why can't you be more like her?" Instead, teach a replacement behavior in a positive way.
And yes, he does get two treats but also a mama celebration which is usually a greater reward for little ones.
No comments:
Post a Comment